"Stick to the script, Peacecraft!" Shinigami Baby hollered.
Relena sweatdropped, then continued her lines. "Someone mysterious... and suicidal, too. I think that is the perfect guy for me to stalk." Her eye twitched. Relena realized that playing Alice wasn't what she had expected it to be. Wufei stretched out, then looked off stage and did his best cat-impression.
"Mew mew mew." Wufei said quite simply. Then he muttered under his breath. "How unjust..."
"What is that Dyna?" Relena said, sticking to her lines. Then she looked off stage as well. She and Wufei had to contain their laughter as Heero came hopping out dressed as a rabbit, wearing a red vest and spectacles. He was holding out a pocket watch and talked right from the script.
"I'm-late, I'm-late. For-a-very-important-date. No-time-to-say-hello, goodbye-I'm-late-I'm-late-I'm-late." Heero said as if he were reading slowly.
Shinigami Baby frowned. She shook her head and took an asprin.
Relena looked at Heero and said "Look Wu-erm, Dyna, a white rabbit! He looks like he's in a big hurry, ne? I think I'll stalk him!" And with that, Relena ran after Heero, Wufei behind her, running on his hands and knees. As the scene went on, Relena fell into the fake hole and found herself at a door that Heero went through. She went to turn the knob when...
"HEY! That shit hurts!!!" The doorknob cried in a rather mean tone.
Relena looked down. "Oh my, I'm terribly sorry... well, not really. See, I'm stalk- uhh following a white rabbit. Did he pass through here?"
"Pssh, stupid girl, how the hell should I know!?" The doorknob replied.
"TASUKI!" Shinigami Baby yelled from off the set. "Watch that language, pally!"
Tasuki sighed. "Yeeees, ma'aaaam.... bitch."
"I HEARD THAT!"
"Well where is the white rabbit then?" Relena asked, trying to further the plot.
"On the other friggin' side, dumbass." He replied. "Damn girls are dumb."
Off stage, Wufei cheered for his woman-hating comrade.
"How do I get to the other side? Is there a key?" Relena asked.
"Yeh right up there." Tasuki said, looking up at the key on the table.
"Oh, cool." Relena grabbed the key and shoved it in Tasuki's fanged mouth. The door swung open.
Shinigami Baby sweatdropped. She didn't want to ruin the story anymore than she had already, but she wanted to avoid a very long and boring scene.
Relena walked through the door and suddenly heard the opening music to the song 'You Sexy Thing'. She looked ahead and walked toward the music. She peeked through some bushes and saw two very good-looking guys. Relena wiggled her eyebrows and watched Treize Khushrenada get a tan. Her brother, Milliardo was there too, but who checks out their brother? Milliardo looked up at her and shrieked.
Treize looked up as well. "Oh, hey. He's Tweedle Dee and I'm-"
"Absolutely delicious!" Relena screamed as she ran up to Treize.
"Script! Script!" Treize shouted.
Milliardo checked his script. "Uhh, that's in the script, sir."
"D'oh! Wrong script, that was the FIRST draft!" Shinigami Baby shouted.
Everyone glared at her. She grinned. "Heh, next scene!"
Relena waited while the scenery was moved.
"Whoa, you're asking me for a date?"
"Yeah. And if you say no, I'll be very sad."
Milliardo scratched the back of his head. "But Dorothy, you're like... 15."
"I don't care, Milliardo-san!" Dorothy shouted, throwing her arms around him. What a convinient time for who else to walk by but-
"Lucrezia! HELP!" Milliardo pleaded.
Noin looked up from her coffee and smiled. "Nani?"
"Get this crazy girl off meeeeee!!!"
Noin thought for a moment. "Well, you were very oblivious to my feelings for you so I think............. I'll let her scare you for a little while. Ja ne." Noin walked away, sipping her coffee, smiling smugly.
Milliardo cried in frustration.
"Heero, isn't this fun?" Relena asked, hanging onto his arm.
"Sure, Relena. I'm having the time of my life." Heero replied sarcastically.
"Oh, Heero, I'm sure that-"
"YO, ALICE, GET YOUR BUTT ONSTAGE!" Quatre hollered.
Relena sighed and walked back onto the stage.
"Okay aaaand GO!" Shinigami Baby commanded.
Relena walked until she came to a house with loud music coming out of it. It sounded strangely like a party of some kind. "Maybe that sexy white rabbit is here..." Relena said, opening the gate an walking into the backyard as the music grew louder. She looked at what all the fuss was about.
It wasn't a party at all... Just two weird guys jumping on a table and spilling tea everywhere. They were singing something about 'Un-Birthdays'. She was about to walk away when the shorter blonde guy noticed her.
"Heyyyy! Merry Un-Birthday!" He jumped down off the table and grabbed Relena's arm.
"What the? Hey, what's up with that hat?" Relena asked.
"Durr, I'm the Mad HATTER." Quatre said, pointing to the oversized tophat resting on his head.
"Oh... that makes sense. So, are you mad?" Relena asked.
Quatre shot her a death glare. "NO!"
Relena pulled her head back. "Gomen!" She looked up at the dude on the table. He was dressed as a clown, but had Rabbit ears. "Do you know the white rabbit?" She asked him.
Trowa looked her way and smiled. "Honey, I'm the March Hare, not the white rabbit!" He then threw a tea cup over his shoulder and ran up to where Quatre and Relena were. "So, I hear it's your Un-Birthday?"
Relena looked uncomfortable. "What's an 'Un-Birthday'?"
Quatre looked at Trowa and wiggled his eyebrows. "An Un-Birthday? It's only like... almost everyday of the year!"
"Excuse me?" Relena asked.
"Why? Did you pass gas? Oof I hate it when that happens, especially when Quatre's-"
"AAAH! That's NOT in the script!" Shinigami Baby shouted, drowning out the last part of Trowa's sentence. "And by the way, why's Trowa acting all silly?"
"Duoooo?" Everyone said.
"Nani?" Duo replied.
"What did you do to Trowa?" Relena demanded, pointing to Trowa, who was picking his nose. "He's never like this!"
"Well, that's not totally true, when we're alone Trowa is actually quite frisky...."
"QUATRE!" Everyone shouted.
"AAAH! Did I say that outloud? Whoops!" Quatre covered his mouth and walked offstage to get something to drink. Trowa followed him, mischief in his eyes.
"Uh... that's a wrap for today, my head hurts too much...." Shinigami Baby said, getting out of her chair. "And Duo... don't drug Trowa again tomorrow or I'll be very pissed."
Duo gulped and nodded. "Damn she knew..."
Everyone cleared off the set and went home.
Shinigami Baby is the author of -1 other stories.